The actress now understands why her parents were often “manipulative”
Shailene Woodley admitted that her parents weren’t always on her side when people bullied her, as they opted to analyze the reason for their actions instead.
Woodley’ mother, a counselor, and her psychologist father always wanted her to see people’s behavior from their perspective, prompting the actress to hate them for a time. As she grew up, however, she began to understand what her folks were trying to teach her.
She told The Edit magazine: “There were times in school, when someone said something really mean, it would hurt my feelings, and my parents weren’t on my side. They would be like, ‘I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way, but what do you think that person was feeling?’ Oh, I hated it.
Now, of course, I understand; it enabled me to recognise that no-one’s evil, they’re probably hurting and can’t express themselves, get no love at home, so it’s repeated. It gave me a broader outlook; just put yourself in another person’s shoes.”
The Snowden star also says that her family – who often allowed runaways to stay over at their place – means absolutely everything to her and she is happy to always count on them.
“I came home to things that weren’t great. My family is super-f***ed up in many ways, but they are also my everything.
They would do anything for me, and I would do anything for them. That’s a lot more than most people can say about their families. I’m grateful for the s**t that happened.”
Whenever Woodley argued with her brother, their parents would ask them to spend some time hugging outside so that neighbors and others could witness it.
She added: “The whole time you’re just seething, you’re disliking this person with so much energy, but if you let go you have to stay there for an extra hour. That was the kind of reverse, manipulative psychology my parents were into.”